Uk news Brave Lanarkshire woman speaks out on self-harm after years of torment MetiNews.Com

MetiNews.Com - After losing her dad and best friend to suicide, Charlotte Cassidy began self-harming before getting help.

Uk news Brave Lanarkshire woman speaks out on self-harm after years of torment MetiNews.Com

MetiNews.Com - After losing her dad and best friend to suicide, Charlotte Cassidy began self-harming before getting help.

Uk news  Brave Lanarkshire woman speaks out on self-harm after years of torment MetiNews.Com
22 November 2020 - 07:15

Breaking News ! Charlotte Cassidy, who began self-harming when she was in first year at high school, was only two when her dad took his own life, aged 28. When she was nine, an older cousin let slip that her dad George Balner hadn’t died as a result of an accident as her protective mum had led her to believe, and Charlotte’s mental health then took a battering. The revelation was to set her on a long and spiralling path of destruction, in which she’d tell her frantic mum, Grace, that she wanted to die the same way as her daddy did. She was not alone in her concealed self-harming. Her best friend, Steven McCloy, was also inflicting wounds on himself, using sweat bands to hide his injuries. Steven was Charlotte’s rock. But he went on to kill himself. She began drinking heavily, which would prompt her to self-harm more frequently. “I had known Steven was struggling, but I didn’t know it was bad. Looking back, I was battling the same things and did not notice the signs in Steven. I could have tried to piece it all together. I was a teenager and it was a conversation I didn’t know how to have. “If I had said ‘how are you, are you feeling like taking your own life?’ maybe it could have been prevented. I did not know we both needed help.” Hamilton Design comp for Hamilton Mausoleum Violence towards frontline staff £50m-£100m plan for bridge over loch Cop shop evacuated Charlotte managed to hide the wounds on her arms and thighs from her mum for three years by wearing long sleeves and scarves, pretending to be cold, before Grace realised how her daughter’s anguish was manifesting itself. “I was 16 before my mum had an inkling. I had a bad cut on my arm. It was pretty big for maybe a week and a half,” explained Charlotte, 26. “I was at my auntie’s and took my jacket off without thinking. I had a bandage on. When my mum asked what is that, I said it was nothing. But she took the bandage off and just broke down crying. From that moment, she did everything to help me.” Charlotte, whose lack of concentration at school was put down to bad behaviour, says counselling did not work. “I couldn’t relate to someone in a suit, asking me questions from a book,” she said. “I was feeling so low, I felt empty, I felt nothing. Self -harming makes you at least feel something. I didn’t feel ashamed, then. I felt embarrassed.

.” Then, there was another momentous event in the life of a broken 17-year-old Charlotte – and it had the potential to either save or ruin her. She became pregnant. “I fell in love with my wee boy from the minute I knew I was pregnant. “When Tyler came along, I had something to wake up for. He was my turning point. I could sleep and eat. I had a purpose,” said Charlotte, who immediately turned her back on her old life of binge drinking and waiting in A&E to have her gashed arms stitched. Now a mum to Tyler, eight, the aptly named two-year-old Hope, and one-year-old Lochlan, Charlotte has re-assessed her mum’s decision to protect her from the truth about her dad’s death. (Image: Stuart Vance/ReachPlc) “How do you explain to a wean how a man, a father, a parent was able to do that? How do you explain why he is no longer there? It must have been so hard for my mum, but I didn’t see it that way at the time,” admits Charlotte, who says her dad’s note proves that his final thoughts were of her. “We all need to talk about how we feel. You cannot get help to get over your fears if you will not face them. You can kid on it is not a problem but it will eat away at you if you do not speak. “It took me 20 years to speak about my dad and seven years to speak about Steven. My mum was trying to protect me, trying to do her best for me when she didn’t know what best was. It put even more stress on her. Maybe if she’d just asked me what I needed and I had just told her...” Get the latest Lanarkshire news straight to your inbox! Sign up for the new Lanarkshire newsletter! From the latest breaking news to the agenda-setting stories, get it all in your email inbox. Put your email at the top of this article or follow the instructions on this link. A well as loving life as a full-time mum to the three kids she adores, peer support volunteer Charlotte devotes time to Lanarkshire-based charity FAMS, of which Steven McCloy’s mum, Meg, is a co-founder. To other people who self- harm as a way of coping with overwhelming emotional distress, Charlotte, of Viewpark, said: “Nobody can help you if you don’t tell them what is going on. “It doesn’t have to be a professional. Speak to someone who is close to you. “If you don’t know where to look for help, they can do it anonymously on your behalf. You don’t need to hide what you’re going through.” FAMS can be reached at info@fams.chat or by calling 07736 326062.

Source = MetiNews.Com

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Uk news Brave Lanarkshire woman speaks out on self-harm after years of torment MetiNews.Com


Uk news Brave Lanarkshire woman speaks out on self-harm after years of torment MetiNews.Com


Uk news Brave Lanarkshire woman speaks out on self-harm after years of torment MetiNews.Com


Uk news Brave Lanarkshire woman speaks out on self-harm after years of torment MetiNews.Com

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